Gotcha Day – One Year Later

What a year it has been since September 14, 2009 – the day we met our boys.  In many ways it flew by.  The most telling thought, however, is that we cannot imagine life without Daniel and David in our family.  It feels as though we’ve known them as sons from infancy.  I think this is because they (especially Daniel) have such great memories and are gifted story tellers.  They have told us stories from their younger days and we feel as though it was “our kids” going through these experiences, as though maybe we should have been there to protect them and hold them.

We celebrated this special occasion with an Ethiopian dinner.  Because of Back to School Night, we couldn’t go out as a family, so Sary-Jo drove to Seattle this afternoon and picked up dinner to go.  Also, thanks to Donna and family for the great gift (they opened the books at dinnertime).  And thanks to many friends who sent greetings via FaceBook and email.  We’re touched by everyone’s continued support.

We could not adequately tell the story of this past year even if we wrote a book and made a full-length feature movie.  We are overwhelmed (in a good way) as we look back at the year.  Nevertheless, we’ll try to put some key thoughts and insights into this humble blog posting.

Growth – In every conceivable way, these boys have achieved several years’ worth of growth.  Physically, they’ve shot up about 6 or 8 inches each and really filled out.  English language skills are approaching their normal grade level.  They are doing very well in school all around.  Daniel, being in a higher grade, is below grade level but is doing a great job of listening, following directions, and making good decisions.  Since David started in first grade, he is really at or above grade level (not to mention Teacher’s Pet – see Personalities, below).  One year ago they knew no English; today, they are reading challenging books and comprehending much of what they read – amazing!  They are gaining social skills daily, although we still try to be somewhat protective of their surroundings.  Nightmares are much less frequent and I think they are very close to understanding what it means to be “family.”  Expecting them to know the meaning of permanence is unrealistic at this time, but there are good signs that they will get there.

Humor – We laugh quite a bit.  Most of the time it’s because Daniel and/or David are trying to be funny (and fully succeeding).  Occasionally, we end up laughing because English is weird and the boys are literal.  Last night, after the first BSF class of the year, Sary-Jo asked Daniel, “How big is your class?”  Without skipping a beat he replied, “I think about an inch and a half.”  We love to watch reruns of “I Love Lucy” and laugh at Ricky’s accent (Daniel can mimic it pretty well).

Struggles – We still have plenty of challenges teaching the boys how a family operates.  It can be very frustrating to get “push back” on virtually every item you ask a child to do.  They need to learn when negotiations are open and when the situation has been settled long before they were invited to learn about it.  We’re seeing progress.  But, with academic growth coming so fast, it can be very hard to accept an area that is progressing more normally.  We are looking forward to the time that mornings are not a total struggle.  They do not have a sense of time, which is quite difficult to accommodate.  The stress level is quite high when the time to leave approaches.

Personalities – David is Janel.  Daniel is Sarah.  Actually, the similarities ARE astonishing.  David is very outgoing – tonight at school, it seemed as if half the students at the school said hello to him.  Daniel is more reluctant to make friends, especially in a group setting; he does not like to be in the limelight.  For me, the thing that stands out about Daniel is his amazing heart for the mind and will of God.  He has insight into the character of God from his knowledge of the Bible that astounds us regularly (frankly, we were amazed with the number of Bible stories he was familiar with).  This is a tribute to the care and nurturing he received in the YWAM orphanage.  David makes people smile all the time – he seems to think that his mission in life is to be the center of attention and to be funny.  Our goal is to help him channel that to make sure he is situationally aware and appropriate.

Health – With reasonably good nutrition, they are growing so fast we can hear them if it’s quiet (assuming it could possibly be quiet with them in the area).  We’ve taken care of a number of issues that are relatively common in African children.  It’s taken many doctor visits to get them up to date on vaccinations, check for various tropical conditions, put Daniel’s broken arm in a cast, handle the fact that he’s growing so fast his body cannot completely keep up, etc.  All in all, they are both in good health and they are very good patients.  They’ve had more shots and more blood draws than most people get in a given year, but they don’t complain (much).  We’re pleased with the care they’re receiving.  It seems like we meet a lot of new people with the same first name, Doctor.  Daniel is scheduled for minor surgery tomorrow morning to stop his frequent nosebleeds.  Both boys enjoy being VERY  ACTIVE – soccer, bicycles, skating, running, throwing a baseball, on and on and on… yet they can now sit quietly for long periods of time reading or playing with building toys/blocks – all indications of healthy, growing boys. Daniel recently began working out with push-ups, sit-ups, and curls.  David helps him keep an accurate count.

So, as we look back on the year, we are in awe of God’s goodness to us.  He continues to weave our family together and provide for all our needs.  He even provides just enough strength to keep up at our age.  We’re starting to get the hang of this “new normal” and we praise God that He continues to bless and shape our family.