Sandi & Sary-Jo
Sary-Jo’s dear friend from Idaho, Sandi, stopped by for a visit. Her son in law is stationed at Fort Lewis so we are looking forward to many more visits. Sandi has four grandchildren now!! WOW!! She drove here with the two that live near her and then came over with Amy, Brian, and their two. It was a hot night, but we sure enjoyed seeing all of them!! Click on the picture to see more.
We are currently hosting a teacher from China. He goes by the name of Phil and is here with a group of high school students from Chong Qing. Sarah and Kyle hosted him until Sarah left for South Africa. His English is fantastic and we have truly enjoyed getting to know him. One of the highlights of having him with us has been watching him learn about baseball. Here are a couple pictures from a trip to see the Mariners.
Phil and Sary-Jo
Before the game
Sarah is currently in South Africa with a group from her church, High Pointe. There are three teams in total, and we’ve provided a link to their blog. Or, you can just click here. We are very pleased that she’s on this trip and pray daily for God’s protection and for His hand in their ministry.
Last Friday and Saturday, we attended adoption training specifically tailored for families adopting older children (i.e., not infants). Before elaborating, let me give a brief summary:
For those who will be around the boys in their first few weeks and months, please read on regarding attachment. We will attempt to describe how you can help us ensure the boys properly “attach” to us as their parents. Much of this is from the class; some of it is our own thoughts and ramblings…
Since the kids have significant life experience outside of our family and our culture, our number one job is to help them learn to be part of our family with its own unique structure and guidelines. Their culture is much more open. We have seen from video, pictures, and first-hand accounts from people who have interacted with them that the boys are outgoing and love people very much. This is good, but might actually make their attachment somewhat complicated. They will tend to go to anyone, and accept things (and direction) from virtually anyone. In order for us to establish our role as Mom and Dad, we need you to “send” them to us when, for instance, they might ask you for something. “I’m not your Mom (or Dad)” is a phrase we would like you to use rather frequently, at least for a while. We don’t want them afraid of people, but some reluctance to go to others is healthy, appropriate and necessary. There’s no magic formula and we’ll be finding our way as we go. And we’ll probably make mistakes so we ask your forgiveness in advance in case we upset you along the way.
Also, during the workshops we met several people who have been there (and then some!) with adoption. We were able to have fantastic discussions with some of the kids, including biological kids who became part of a larger family. It was incredibly helpful to hear the perspective of all the kids. They were extremely gracious and entertained all our questions on a variety of topics, some of which were rather personal. We met and talked with kids who were adopted at the same age that our boys are now. They’re adjusting quite well and that alone is encouraging to us.
We had met Jeff and Chris previously, but we spent hours Thursday and Friday evenings getting to know them much better. They are a bit younger than us (but not too much; they have a young grandchild). They have kids at home, some of whom were adopted as infants. They are now adopting two children from the same orphanage in Ethiopia that our boys live in. Jeff went to Ethiopia in March of this year and was with our boys when they learned that they’re our boys! In fact, I think that experience helped influence their decision to adopt. What a blessing to hear his account of that significant event. We already have a strong connection to them, and I think they’ll stay on speed-dial for many years.
We also met Chuck and Teresa, who live north of Seattle and are considering the adoption of an older boy (13-plus) from China. They are not sure the process can be completed before the boy becomes too old to be adopted (China has an age limit at the 14th birthday). Basically, if God opens the door they plan to go through it! They have a fantastic testimony about their older children and eagerness to include this special boy from China in their family. They also have a tremendous story about their son’s brush with death last year. I’ve included a link to their blog.
There’s so much more we could write about this. We were so blessed by the weekend that it’s really hard to convey. This is as concise as I can be.
Due to the MOWA closure, our case was rescheduled to July 31. Although we are somewhat disappointed, we were very aware that this was a likely scenario due to the closure of the ministry. We are grateful, in fact, that our new court date is so soon. Praise God that He is in control.
A couple days ago Ethiopia’s Ministry of Women’s Affairs (MOWA) closed for two weeks. We understand these types of events are not uncommon, but we are in a bit of limbo at the moment. Our court date is Wednesday and, if MOWA processed our recommendation, we should pass court. However, if they did not finish the paperwork on our case we will most likely have to wait for another court date. And for now, there is no way for our agency to find out if they finished the work on our case. We’ll know Wednesday when we find out if we passed court. God is in control.
We changed the site so that you can leave comments. We’re going to try it for a while. If you would like, you may leave a comment on any post! Hint: click on Comments (it might say No Comments) near the title of the post.
Also, we updated the “About Us” page.
June was, to put it mildly, an emotional roller-coaster month. We started the month with Sary-Jo injured, having severely sprained her ankle on May 31. We would not learn the full extent of the injury until late June. She didn’t go to the doctor until 2 1/2 weeks after the initial injury and it took another week to fully assess a torn ligament. She is now pursuing an aggressive physical therapy regimen and prospects are good that she will be able to build enough strength to avoid surgery.
Then on the 3rd of the month we lost a good friend unexpectedly and rather suddenly. We talk more specifically about David in another post. Through all this, we have seen God use our church and our small group to minister to each other and to David’s wife Madaline. So it has been a time of pain, but also a time of comfort and growth. We continue to see His comfort, guidance and growth in our lives and those of our dear friends.
Our oldest daughter, Sarah, was diagnosed with Psoriatic Arthritis and is on a chemo regimen until August. She gives herself shots weekly. She maintains a positive attitude and is doing well. In August she will begin a biologics treatment that also involves weekly injections. This treatment is from human cells, mimics the immune system, and has proven to be very effective in arresting the progression of the disease. She loves her work with exchange students and is now also working at an alternative high school as the graduation specialist in charge of making sure the seniors have completed all the requirements for graduation. She has raised support and has been preparing for a mission trip to South Africa late July where she will minister to the youth. She is a remarkable young lady and we are very proud of her!
Janel moved a couple of weeks ago to an apartment in Oakland. One of her housemates from UPS is moving in with her in August. She found the chaplaincy program she was in much too stressful. She is now working at a shoe store in Berkeley and going to school at night to get her Sign Language Interpreters certificate. We think this is a great fit for her! She is dating Ryan and is as happy as can be!
Meanwhile at work, Randy’s key project reached a successful conclusion (except for some paperwork). This too was somewhat bittersweet because this project will be his last meaningful achievement with the company after a 26-plus year relationship. Again, we see the hand of God as Randy is mentally prepared to separate from the company. In addition, leading the project helped re-invigorate Randy in a hands-on role and increased his confidence. He is now very ready to join another firm and contribute to its success.
As for the adoption, we began the month wondering why we didn’t yet have a court date. We understood that court dates are typically assigned about two months in advance so we were concerned that we might not actually get the boys until late Autumn. This seemed like a long delay, but we knew that God was in control. We just didn’t understand what good would come from the delay so we were a bit frustrated. Before the month ended, however, we had our court date and it was only three weeks out!!! Now we’re anxious about the embassy appointment, but that’s another story.
With the court date known, and the embassy date narrowed to a couple likely dates, we’re able to do some “what if” travel planning. We are so eager to get our boys home, yet we’re also a bit excited about possibly adding some leisure travel to the trip. Our daughter Sarah has been very helpful in mapping out some alternatives for us, and now we just need to know the date of the embassy appointment so we can put the plans in motion.
This is but a quick synopsis of the month. Through all the highs and lows we have seen the constancy of God. We depend on Him fully and are so grateful that He cares for us.
Please pray:
What is man that you are mindful of him, the son of man that you care for him? Psalm 8:4
We received a phone call just before noon today telling us our court date is July 15!!! After we pass court (and the kids are ours in the eyes of the Ethiopian government), they’ll schedule an appointment with the US embassy in Addis Ababa. The earliest possibility is August 18, but we won’t know until after we pass court. Please pray for: 1) we pass court on the 15th of July, and 2) expedited embassy appointment.
Praise God – we’re still waiting, but it’s a new phase of waiting!!!
We just got home from a fantastic afternoon/evening event hosted by a family that recently adopted a boy from Ethiopia. There were many families in various stages of the adoption process (including several who already had their kids with them). It was so nice to discuss our stories, and how God called each of the couples/families into adopting Ethiopian children. And, of course, playing with and holding these precious children was the highlight.
We finally met the Kerrigans, whose blog we’ve been following. We enjoyed meeting Caleb and Eli after months of praying for their arrival home!
Thank you to the Markquarts for hosting. We had a great time.
